Two and a Half Men (2003)

Season 9

September 19, 2011 24 Episodes

A new chapter begins when internet billionaire Walden Schmidt moves in, bringing fresh energy, wealth, and more absurd adventures to the Malibu household.

Episodes

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
Episode 1
4.5

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

Sep 19, 2011

21 minutes

Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

People Who Love Peepholes
Episode 2
5.0

People Who Love Peepholes

Sep 26, 2011

21 minutes

Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

Big Girls Don't Throw Food
Episode 3
4.8

Big Girls Don't Throw Food

Oct 3, 2011

20 minutes

Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

Nine Magic Fingers
Episode 4
4.4

Nine Magic Fingers

Oct 10, 2011

21 minutes

Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
Episode 5
5.1

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

Oct 17, 2011

20 minutes

Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

The Squat and Hover
Episode 6
4.6

The Squat and Hover

Oct 24, 2011

21 minutes

Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
Episode 7
5.1

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

Oct 31, 2011

19 minutes

Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brother left him in his will.

Thank You for the Intercourse
Episode 8
5.5

Thank You for the Intercourse

Nov 7, 2011

21 minutes

When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

Frodo's Headshots
Episode 9
5.6

Frodo's Headshots

Nov 14, 2011

21 minutes

Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
Episode 10
5.1

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

Nov 21, 2011

21 minutes

Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

What a Lovely Landing Strip
Episode 11
5.2

What a Lovely Landing Strip

Dec 5, 2011

20 minutes

Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

One False Move, Zimbabwe!
Episode 12
4.8

One False Move, Zimbabwe!

Dec 12, 2011

21 minutes

Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him into a downward spiral.

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
Episode 13
4.9

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

Jan 2, 2012

20 minutes

Walden’s ex-wife and mother try to take control of his company, so he turns to Alan for help.

A Possum on Chemo
Episode 14
5.3

A Possum on Chemo

Jan 16, 2012

20 minutes

Zoey tries to convince Walden to cut his hair and shave; Alan and Lyndsey revive their relationship.

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
Episode 15
5.1

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

Feb 6, 2012

21 minutes

Walden tries to loosen Zooey up by sharing some of Berta's special brownies.

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
Episode 16
5.4

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

Feb 13, 2012

20 minutes

Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on Valentine's Day.

Not in My Mouth!
Episode 17
4.0

Not in My Mouth!

Feb 20, 2012

19 minutes

Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has a drinking problem.

The War Against Gingivitis
Episode 18
4.7

The War Against Gingivitis

Feb 27, 2012

21 minutes

Walden's ex-business partner shows up at the beach house looking to make peace.

Palmdale, Ech
Episode 19
4.6

Palmdale, Ech

Mar 19, 2012

21 minutes

Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers. Jake and Eldridge get a ride from Walden to a party.

Grandma's Pie
Episode 20
4.3

Grandma's Pie

Apr 9, 2012

21 minutes

Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Alan and Lyndsey try to cope with their mom's relationship.

Mr. Hose Says "Yes"
Episode 21
5.5

Mr. Hose Says "Yes"

Apr 16, 2012

21 minutes

Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargained for when he moves in with Lyndsey

Why We Gave Up Women
Episode 22
5.8

Why We Gave Up Women

Apr 30, 2012

21 minutes

Charlie's ghost pays a visit to Alan after he suffers a minor heart attack.

The Straw in My Donut Hole
Episode 23
4.9

The Straw in My Donut Hole

May 7, 2012

21 minutes

Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn’t so sure it’s deserved.

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
Episode 24
5.3

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

May 14, 2012

21 minutes

Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.